I've started this post a dozen times, each time not sure exactly what to say.
So I've decided, I think, to just say this:
Sharing my sister is one of the hardest things I've had to do this far in life. Knowing that I won't get to call her when I need someone to make me laugh, or be able to burst out randomly in song and have someone there to finish it with me. Knowing that she will likely not be here for big changes within our family, as I start my career and decide exactly what I am going to make of this life of mine.
When I think of her not being here I can't help but cry.
However one thing I know without a doubt is this:
God is good.
He knows when we hurt, when we cry, and he knows how best to heal our pains.
For me that healing is the rain.
I am of the mindset that rain gets a bad reputation-for me rain is something that I find incredibly beautiful, a reminder of how grand and incredible and eternal things really are.
And it seems that when I most need it, when I hurt or stressed or scared God opens the heavens a little and lets the rain remind me that he is there.
Friday and Saturday I sat in our dark living room in awe-mesmerized by the rain beating down from the sky against our little house, against me. It was the reminder that I needed-that I am never alone.
So although Abbie won't be here for 18 months, at least I'll have the rain, and more importantly all that it brings with it.
So I've decided, I think, to just say this:
Sharing my sister is one of the hardest things I've had to do this far in life. Knowing that I won't get to call her when I need someone to make me laugh, or be able to burst out randomly in song and have someone there to finish it with me. Knowing that she will likely not be here for big changes within our family, as I start my career and decide exactly what I am going to make of this life of mine.
When I think of her not being here I can't help but cry.
However one thing I know without a doubt is this:
God is good.
He knows when we hurt, when we cry, and he knows how best to heal our pains.
For me that healing is the rain.
I am of the mindset that rain gets a bad reputation-for me rain is something that I find incredibly beautiful, a reminder of how grand and incredible and eternal things really are.
And it seems that when I most need it, when I hurt or stressed or scared God opens the heavens a little and lets the rain remind me that he is there.
Friday and Saturday I sat in our dark living room in awe-mesmerized by the rain beating down from the sky against our little house, against me. It was the reminder that I needed-that I am never alone.
So although Abbie won't be here for 18 months, at least I'll have the rain, and more importantly all that it brings with it.
Before her farewell
After she was set apart as a full time missionary
Right before heading to the MTC
I hope you all know too that I could not be more happy for Abbie. There is nowhere else I would rather her be during this time than on a mission-dedicating herself full time to preaching the gospel of our Lord. Honestly I am so very happy for her, so very proud of her, and so excited for what this will do to her and her life.
It's just that sometimes sharing your sister is hard.
If you're a fan of Abbie's (and really who isn't?) please feel free to check out her blog. Mom has asked me to take it on, and share her pictures and letters with our friends and family. Honestly, if you miss her just read her letters-there is no way to be anything but happy after that.
You can find the blog here.
Or on the sidebar!
